A Dame to Kill For
by MuchMoreRetro
Summary: Jemma Simmons had signed up for adventure and discovery, but now she was in a fight for survival. And survival meant taking the shots you have and forgetting about chivalry and playing fair. Ward would never give up on Skye so she'd put an end to it. Set just after 'If I see you again, I'll kill you'. Sadly this isn't noir, if only I'd had the forethought.


**_Word count: 2225_**

**_Rating: T_**

**_Disclaimer: I gots nothing._**

**_Authors note: This was a quick one-shot I pulled together. My first Shield fic. I hope you like it. I might do a follow up. Or perhaps a prequel. But it'll probably be a series of one shots as oppose to a series. All feedback welcome, I don't currently have a beta so apologies for any errors, they're all mine._**

"_If I see you again, I'll kill you."_

Jemma felt a small, but strong hand capture hers and squeeze tightly. She had to close her eyes and simply breath. Her heart was playing an irregular tattoo against her sternum, her blood pumping at dizzying speeds around her small frame. The biochemist was light headed… and she was seething.

The last time Jemma Simmons had the pleasure of seeing Agent Grant Ward it had been through a window of 2 inch, bullet proof pressure resistant glass. The last time she'd had the pleasure, it was _her_ in captivity. How much difference a few months can make. Of course the next time Jemma would have the pleasure, she'd kill him, she was certain of it. She'd take her time too if the occasion allowed.

Delicate fingers laced between her own as a thumb slowly began to caress her palm. Jemma let out a steadying breath, one she hadn't realized she'd been holding. 'It's okay Jem,' came Skye's voice, almost a whisper. 'He's gone, to a place where he can't hurt us, or anybody else'. Jemma knew that Skye's words of reassurance were just as much for her own piece of mind than they were for the doctor's.

Skye was close now, closer than they'd been in a long time, and Jemma took strength in the feeling of protection the taller girl's frame offered. She could feel Skye's chin nestled softly on her shoulder, her warm breath tickling the soft skin of her neck. Their clasped hands were now resting gently on Jemma's stomach, and they simply stood for a moment. 'We're still here.' Skye offered, her voice quiet but sincere.

As much as Jemma wished she could agree with Skye, she couldn't look back on the past months and not see the damage Ward's betrayal had reeked on each and every member of her team. Maybe one day they might recover from the emotional trauma, but there were physical scars too, and they were the wounds that would not heal so easily.

'Not entirely'. Jemma spoke, grimly. She was passed guilt, passed feeling responsible. There was nothing to be done, not anymore. If she could go back would she have done things differently? Most definitely. Would Fitz have let her? Never. Fitz was nothing if not stubborn, even more so now than ever before.

'Hey,' Skye nudged Jemma's shoulder with her chin, gently asking her to meet her gaze. Jemma shook her head softly; her new bangs grazing Skye's cheeks, hoping Skye would understand.

When she'd cut her hair it was the beginning of something new for Jemma Simmons, a watershed moment, a departure from her old life, and her arrival into a new one. But as soon as her position within Hydra had been compromised that all changed. Or rather, it simply reverted back to how things had been before she'd left. Fitz was still unwell, Ward had still betrayed them in ways that were still completely incomprehensible to her, friends and colleagues from the Triskelion were still being declared dead or MIA, and Skye was, well Skye still found ways to get under her skin.

She didn't feel like talking, she didn't feel like bearing her all. Jemma Simmons was never very good with feelings. Needs and desires yes, they were a fundamental human predilection. They were only natural. Human beings had been acting on their wants and desires for thousands of years, they'd only been talking about their feelings for under a century. Being open about one's feelings wasn't something that came naturally, especially with scientists, and especially with scientists named Dr Jemma Simmons.

After a firmer 'Hey' from Skye and a squeeze of her hand, Jemma relented with a sigh. When she wanted, Skye could be just as stubborn as Fitz, and Jemma wasn't nearly as good at resisting the girl on her shoulder as she was resisting her best friend. Resisting Fitz was an art she'd perfected, resisting Skye was an impossibility.

Jemma turned slowly, resting her back against the doorframe, with her hand still tightly within the hacktivist's and her eyes everywhere but Skye's.

'I'm sorry darling. I can't… I can't look at him without…' The corridor was quiet now, their team having dissipated after the brief commotion of Ward's transfer.

'I know.'

'You're better at this stoic spy thing than me'. Skye let herself laugh a little at the clumsy compliment, and Jemma felt some colour return to her cheeks. Skye was turning into quite the asset in the field, and as terrifying as it was that the girl in front of her was now a trained killer, the doctor had to admit that the hacker looked pretty good doing it.

`I know,' Skye smiled, tugging at Jemma's fingers affectionately, 'But don't apologise. You're unbelievably strong. You know that right?' Skye tried to meet Jemma's eyes once more but the doctor could only look away.

'I'm not so sure,' Jemma's voice trembled. She didn't feel strong. She couldn't maintain cover at Hydra, she couldn't stay for Fitz, she didn't stay for Skye.

Skye's grip on her hand tightened and all of a sudden the taller girl was close again, eyes desperately trying to find some purchase. 'Jem, you know what? Next time I see Ward, and God forbid I have to, I don't know if I could do it.' Skye's voice waivered and she shook her head slightly at her own perceived self-doubt. 'May's training me to kill. I've taken a life, or at least I think I have but with Ward…I just don't know if I could pull the trigger.'

Skye raised a hand and delicately wiped away an errant tear Jemma hadn't realized was there with her thumb. 'But I know you will,' Skye continued, resolute. Her eyes had found Jemma's now, and they burned, deep with love, hurt and absolute respect. 'For Fitz, for May, for Coulson. For all the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents who lost their lives when Hydra attacked. You are strong Jemma Simmons, much stronger than you know. I know you've come home and you feel like nothing's changed. But Jem, you've changed, so much.' Jemma sighed. Skye meant every word, she knew that, but Skye also had a bad habit of putting Jemma on a pedestal.

'I don't feel any different,' Jemma shrugged.

Skye smiled warmly again, it was what Skye did when she thought Jemma was being ridiculous. 'That's because you see yourself every day in the mirror, babe. I on the other hand have to wait month after month…'

' I was deep undercover Skye'. They hadn't spoken much since Jemma had returned from working within Hydra. Actually, Jemma noted, this was their conversation that had succeeded in stringing 10 alternating sentences together.

'You don't write, you don't call…' Skye was pouting now, just a little, and Jemma couldn't help but smile, widely. Skye was flirting, and Skye flirting always set Jemma's heart aflutter. She was so beautiful, so unexpected.

'That's what being deep undercover means,' Jemma said, matter-of-factly, but with a smile tempting the corner of her lips.

'Well,' Skye spoke, her eyes now the ones avoiding Jemma's, a small heat rising in her cheeks 'I missed you,' she shrugged.

Skye was starring intently at Jemma's hand neatly clasped within hers. She knew she'd left when so many of her friends had needed her. However, she knew she'd left because in some ways, working under cover in a global terrorist organization that wouldn't hesitate to kill or torture you if they discovered you were working for an outside agency, was easier than seeing Fitz every day. It was easier than muddling through her thoughts and feelings for Skye.

After Ward's betrayal Skye shut down. Shut down to Coulson, to May, but not to Jemma. At first they'd simply sit in silence. Neither wanted to speak much most nights. Fitz was still in critical but stable condition for quite a few weeks after they'd arrived at the playground, and wasn't being treated on site. He was receiving the best medical care possible, and that care wasn't available at the playground. Jemma would pour herself a scotch most nights in an attempt to numb the incessant feeling of helplessness and not knowing, she'd tell Skye how useless she felt, for not being able to help Fitz, and Skye would tell her again and again how she'd saved his life. Eventually Skye would open up about Ward, she told Jemma about their kiss, and how she'd let herself feel something for him. Jemma would tell her that to have gone through what she had, and to still be left standing, Skye was the strongest person she knew.

'I would never have left you, if I hadn't felt it imperative that I do so,' Jemma said with a squeeze of the taller girl's fingers.

After a few weeks Jemma learned about Skye's years in the foster system, the good the bad, the downright terrifying. They would sit together on the under-stuffed sofa most nights, until the early hours of the morning. Skye's head would rest on Jemma's shoulder, or Jemma would sit with her back against Skye's chest, taking comfort in the gentle rise and fall of Skye's breathing. Skye would take sips from Jemma's glass of Laphroaig and Jemma would be able to smell the Scotch as Skye's breath warmed the back of her neck.

'You left at a bad time Jem,' Skye shrugged. Jemma knew Skye didn't blame her, she also knew Skye would have been in the dark.

The morning Coulson had come to speak to her about infiltrating Hydra, Skye had been curled up in Jemma's bunk. Jemma remembered the way Skye's fingers would claw at the cotton sheets whilst she slept, her brow would furrow and Jemma would try and sooth her pulling her close and whispering reassurances in her ear and placing delicate kisses upon her neck.

Coulson's light knock on the door never woke Skye. Nor did Jemma's absence or the conversation that accompanied it. Skye never woke when Jemma crept silently back into the bunk, and slid carefully back under the sheets next to her. The hacker's small hands were clutching at great chunks of sheets once more, her breathing erratic, fearful, her body tense, and Jemma knew she'd made the right choice.

All Jemma could do was nod in agreement. She had left at a bad time, there was no question, but would there ever have been a better one? Coulson hadn't thought so, and she trusted his judgment like she trusted no one else's. Of course she felt guilty, there was no question, but she didn't feel responsible. And if tonight Coulson knocked on her bunk and asked her to do it all over again, she'd do it in an instant.

'I was working in secret to protect the planet from Hydra world domination?' Jemma said, with a dumb smile, in a bid to lighten the mood. She didn't feel like bearing her all. She was rewarded, as Skye couldn't help but grin too, and her dark eyes lit up, dancing in the artificial light of the playground.

Skye tugged on Jemma's hand, beckoning her closer. Skye was letting her back in. 'I wouldn't have had it any other way.' The taller girl closed the distance between them agonizingly slowly as Skye's spare hand moved to Jemma's cheek, bringing her closer whilst moving her thumb across the soft skin there. Jemma's breath hitched, as soft lips captured hers. The kiss what chaste and Jemma savoured it. She'd waited too long. Every night whilst at Hydra she'd fallen asleep with the memory of Skye's lips upon hers, now it didn't have to be a memory.

Jemma pulled Skye closer as she broke their kiss, bringing her forehead to rest upon Skye's. She sighed. 'Have you been okay?' she whispered.

'Uh huh,' Skye said with another soft kiss, 'May's been taking good care of me, you don't need to worry.'

'I've noticed. You're a super spy now.' Jemma said with a coy smile between kisses.

'Ha, I think 'Super' might be being a bit too generous'.

'I don't know, super sounds rather good to me'.

'Charmer'.

'British', Jemma shrugged. 'Comes with the territory'. Skye chuckled, sending vibrations through Jemma's chest, and a shiver down her spine. Another kiss caressed her lips. Skye lingered tenderly for a moment and then pulled back, planting a small shower of kisses across Jemma's right cheek.

They both stayed there, still for a moment, cheek to cheek. Jemma's hands were now in the small of Skye's back, her fingertips tracing gentle patterns across the sliver of bare skins there, whilst Skye's fingers had found their way into Jemma's hair, fingers lacing through the scientist's shorter locks, becoming reacquainted, making new memories.

'Did you mean it?' Skye whispered.

She did. Next time she saw Grant Ward, she'd kill him. Yes for Skye, for Fitz, for everyone he'd ever hurt, but most of all, she'd do it for herself.

Jemma Simmons had signed up for adventure and discovery, but now she was in a fight for survival. And survival meant taking the shots you have and forgetting about chivalry and playing fair. Ward would never give up on Skye so she'd put an end to it.

'Every word darling, every word.' Jemma whispered.

'Good.'


End file.
